...you've been coming up short!

So I just got back from a birthday party for a friend, Evelyn. Adorable little 5 foot thing with big brown eyes and dark hair. I think she's turning 22. I'm not her best friend in the world; I was just excited to get an invite. Clearly I left an impression!

I'm alone at home now and drunk as shit. My music is very gently straddling the line between 'euphoric' and 'loud enough to wake Dad,' but I don't honestly care at the moment. I'm oh so slightly hurting.

Lord (and any remotely close to me) know how pessimistic I am in regards to relationships. Too few gays in the area and the few I know are either unintelligent or taken, or just plain repulsive. The handful of girls I occasionally excess about tend to make my cock stir for all of three minutes.

So I'm left with the dregs of society, or what seems like it in the backwater area I live in. What handful of 'successful' relationships I'm left with parading in front of me are without passion, co-dependent and make me sick to my stomach.

Well, Evelyn is a bit of a Fag Hag, AKA Friend to the Gays, and there were a good number of available homos at said gathering.

I will spare the gory details, but I will say this: After the party had died down and there was four of us gays in the kitchen (with just Host and myself cleaning up the mess), I was told with much snickering and 'There there, honeys' of how I had made a fool of myself and flirted with anything that had something swinging between its' legs.

Which led me to my (nearly) teary-eyed rant to my friend in his truck on the 30 minute ride home about how I should move somewhere with a bigger percentage of homos 'cuz six years after coming out I'm still not sure HOW to act like a gay man and how as much as I hate relationships I wouldn't mind having a boy to go home to and spoon with or AT LEAST a boy to text 'Hey I'm home safe, love you' to.

End of story... I just wanna fuck and be fucked. And then some. Is that so much to ask?

I thought Kylie and leftover spaghetti would raise my spirits... but it ain't working yet.